Oh how the years go by, oh how the love brings tears to my eyes, all through the changes the soul never dies, we laugh we fight we cry, as the years go by. .. Amy Grant
My first child Andy will graduate from high school in about 4 weeks. How did this happen? Everyone told me this day would be here before I knew it, but you don’t think about that in the early years as you are trying to decide when to feed him solid food, rocking him to sleep in that precious rocker you still have, reading the same book to him for the 25th time that day, endless stroller adventures,or laughing so hard and trying to hide it as I try to teach him that he cannot eat Milk Bones with his dog, and toilet paper belongs on the roll, not rolled out of the bathroom, down the hall and into the living room as company arrives.I never thought much about this day in those elementary school days when I made green eggs and ham, we picked out his lunch box together, made his Halloween costumes, and went by Toys R Us everytime I was in town to see if they had new Pokeman cards. He wanted my help to practice for his spelling test and memorizing multiplication tables, and I helped out in his classroom once a week, read with him every night from an exciting adventure or mystery,and told him how great he was at art, even though we both knew he had other gifts.Even during those days of adolescence when I was wondering where my little boy went and where did the aliens take him. His independence had burst anew, trying my patience or getting on my last nerve.I was not giving him enough rope for the trust he was earning and space he needed; I still had a little trouble looking at the big picture. Then I would loosen that rope, and he was good with almost every inch of it.I did get a little misty, when he graduated on Falcon Field from 8th grade, thinking to myself, wow, he really is going to high school next year. We would go to the graduations of our youth at church, and we were thrilled and excited for them, never really noticing the expressions of parents preparing to let go. There were proms, plays, great teachers,vacations,Yosemite ,movies with friends, youth group, FCA, AP tests, becoming a film maker, and arguing over which books and movies he could read or watch. Every day I would call out to him as he headed across the street, “Have a great day! God goes with you!” Some days he would turn his head and smile and say thanks, some days he would just keep going. I prayed and loved. I failed and lost my temper. Some days I would do all of that. My son lived through the tragedy of losing his grandparents to a disease he did not fully understand, but learned to have compassion and care for all of God’s children. He lived through the moment when his father took a stand to leave corruption and begin anew, and everything he was comfortable with was taken, except for the love of his church friends and family (and his stuff). He lived through the anxiousness that just comes with growing up, and knows he can survive it. He has a firm grip on his faith and knows God will always be there, even if mom and dad can’t be.All of those years bring me to these days. I have reflected a lot lately, pulling out old pictures, laughing and crying at the same time for the future and independence he will enjoy as he begins a new life away from home for the first time. I am so thrilled. Why then do I cry from time to time? (Ok ok, about every other day) Why does my heart almost physically hurt when I think about not having Andy at home? I guess it is because this day has come before I knew it. Actually, if I can sit for a few minutes and think about that fact, I am glad I did not know it would come this soon. Many years ago, I read a bumper sticker on the car of an elderly neighbor that said, “Enjoy Every Age.” That thought has stayed with me for many years now. I have the best of memories in my heart, and I pray that as I walk through these days that came before I knew it, I will remember that there are many more ages to enjoy. Love your kids at every age; you will never regret it when the day comes so soon.
