Mom

Mom left earth for eternity last week. It was so fast that it is hard to process my feelings and thoughts right now. Joy in knowing she is with Jesus and my Dad whom she missed so very much. Sorrow deep within that has only surfaced during the strangest moments. Compassion for knowing how much she went through, peace in looking back at how God seemed to be so involved in the details when she left. She had friends, new and old. She was going out more. The day before she died she was able to share her unused airline ticket to send her oldest grandson to Vancouver on a trip the trip of his life (so far). I called her to tell her how grateful and excited we were to be able to go. It was a really great conversation. The last few months we made some terrific memories together. John and I took her up to Apple Hill in the Fall. It was such a beautiful day and we actually talked her into buying a shirt she liked. I felt a great sense of accomplishment that day! She is even wearing it in this picture that I took at Thanksgiving. The holidays were the best we had been able to share in years because she was feeling better, and we all felt better too. I honored my mom. God says that every mother is worthy of honor. I wish I could have had time to say goodbye, that I could have looked in her eyes and really see her say she loved me, not to hear, just to see. The song "Beauty from Pain" has been running through my mind since last Thursday when I held her hand and kissed her goodbye. I really hope that she heard me tell her I loved her. The Dr. said that she couldn't, but only God knows.

After all this has passed

I still will remain.

After I've cried my last,

There'll be beauty from pain.

You will bring beauty from my pain.