The Pastor's Life
I found this picture in a magazine. It was entitled "The Pastor's Life". Wow. It said more to me than a thousand words; at least any I have read to try to explain my husband's life. Every hand in this picture has been a part of 20 years of ministry. There have always been more offerings fragrant roses, praying hands, and others holding him up. I would always prefer the hands clasped in love or the hands reaching out for help, but sometimes the fist or the pointing hand come. Those are the most painful, the hardest to accept, the most difficult to forgive, and most heart wrenching to let go of. These hands have always been a chance to learn from, and the most difficult to discern. I must choose to stay focused on the most precious times of ministry, but recently it has not been easy. Tears come easily when I think of those I have loved and prayed for, served and shared life and laughed with who have left. I am learning (after 20 years!) that I must make the choice to find life's lessons through these times, not to become embittered, which by Satan's hand is too easy. I will follow the path of God's leading, focus on the love I am surrounded by, not by what I have lost. I don't know that I will ever have a grasp on the Call to Ministry. It is a mystery infused with great joy, great heartache, great adversity and a heart full of love, even those that the world would call unlovable. Jesus would call me to give grace, find the best in every person and situation, (especially my husband!) and most importantly, count the blessings. I have seen my husband bring hope to those in situations that would seem hopeless, bring more joy to a beautiful moment in time, and comfort to those whose grief feels unbearable, and share the beginning of a New life in Christ that was once lost. Not by himself, but Christ working through him. I will continue to abide in Christ for the courage to live and learn as I walk this imperfect path of an imperfect life. Tears also come easily also when I think of the miracles, the sharing and sacrifice of others, and the hearts that love purely that I have been privileged to see with my very eyes, and experience even for myself because of The Pastor's Life. 
I found this picture in a magazine. It was entitled "The Pastor's Life". Wow. It said more to me than a thousand words; at least any I have read to try to explain my husband's life. Every hand in this picture has been a part of 20 years of ministry. There have always been more offerings fragrant roses, praying hands, and others holding him up. I would always prefer the hands clasped in love or the hands reaching out for help, but sometimes the fist or the pointing hand come. Those are the most painful, the hardest to accept, the most difficult to forgive, and most heart wrenching to let go of. These hands have always been a chance to learn from, and the most difficult to discern. I must choose to stay focused on the most precious times of ministry, but recently it has not been easy. Tears come easily when I think of those I have loved and prayed for, served and shared life and laughed with who have left. I am learning (after 20 years!) that I must make the choice to find life's lessons through these times, not to become embittered, which by Satan's hand is too easy. I will follow the path of God's leading, focus on the love I am surrounded by, not by what I have lost. I don't know that I will ever have a grasp on the Call to Ministry. It is a mystery infused with great joy, great heartache, great adversity and a heart full of love, even those that the world would call unlovable. Jesus would call me to give grace, find the best in every person and situation, (especially my husband!) and most importantly, count the blessings. I have seen my husband bring hope to those in situations that would seem hopeless, bring more joy to a beautiful moment in time, and comfort to those whose grief feels unbearable, and share the beginning of a New life in Christ that was once lost. Not by himself, but Christ working through him. I will continue to abide in Christ for the courage to live and learn as I walk this imperfect path of an imperfect life. Tears also come easily also when I think of the miracles, the sharing and sacrifice of others, and the hearts that love purely that I have been privileged to see with my very eyes, and experience even for myself because of The Pastor's Life. 
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